It's Been 4 Years, And I Still Can't...

Well, Daddy,

It has been a minute since I sat down to type with just my words and my heart.

I tried playing the song again. It's the song we played on repeat at your visitation: "When I Get Where I Am Going" by Brad Paisley...

I tried to get through it with no tears. 

But I still can't. 

Maybe one day I will. Maybe not. Who's to say?

I know the lyrics speak the same way you would in the flesh: "Don't cry for me down here."

I have no doubts about the Glory and the Splendor that you are experiencing with Jesus.

That's another thing. It seems like since you went home, my eagerness to explore the Word in depth and discover the many, MANY layers to the Bible has consumed me. It's almost like Jesus with you alongside Him saying, "Here is a gift for you to use. Now, use it wisely."

I hope Jesus and you both know how seriously I take reading and teaching the Bible now. How richly it has shown to me our Eternal Father's truly amazing grace!!!

...Yet, I still tried to listen to the song again. And, still, I can't get through it without becoming short of breath and tears welling in my eyes. 

I do rejoice in the victory you gained. I am thankful that you have been reunited with so many who knew and loved you here in life. And as John reveals in his Revelation, that glorious day will come when our Master establishes the New Jerusalem, the New Earth.

"He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Revelation 21:4

Until then, Daddy, I will always miss you. And I will still listen to the song on occasion without any shame if I shed tears or not. 

Enjoy your 4th year pain-free, worry-free, and hug Jesus' neck for me!

Your son,

Brian